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BBM: Beyond Boring Machine

I said it once, I’ll say it again…

I would never date a Blackberry.

For those not following along, my definition of a Blackberry, as it pertains to this blog post, is a person who uses the RIM device, most often associated with finance and entertainment professionals. NOT the fruit…I rather enjoy the fruit actually…

Anyway. Being a Blackberry was cool in the mid-2000’s, pre-iPhone, pre-android. They were most often associated with “success” – mostly because “important” people needed to be available via email at an instant’s notice, and thus had to use said-devices.

However, there’s absolutely no appeal in the modern day era of 2011. Yes, I know the one argument all you Berries have – “But we have BBM (BlackBerry Messenger) – I can talk to anyone in the world!”

NEWSFLASH: There are Messenger apps (What’s App, for example) that allow you to do practically the same thing on iPhone/Android-based phones. Plus, the iPhone 5…which should be out relatively soon…comes with the BBM-equivalent iMessenger.

Thus, your ONE argument for the device fails. Anyway. You know how there’s that whole concept about how pets are a reflection of their owners?  I think the same applies to cell phones. See below:

iPhone/Android Users [checklist]

  • Always looking to reinvent, or “better” oneself (creative? ambitious? Every  year you have something new to provide to society.)
  • User-friendly (yes, people can be user-friendly)
  • They have great game (yes, this is an attempt at a pun)



  • Rigid/conformists (what’s that? You got your phone from your company? You have to be in the office at 2am?)
  • Your soul is dying (because RIM, as a company, is dying)
  • Limited curiosity (googling on a BB is a painful experience)
  • You’re lost (have you tried BB’s attempt at navigation/Google maps? Enough said.) [/badlist]

So there you have it. A completely (un)scientific guide to the difference between iPhone/Android users and “Blackberries” – I hope that after reading this, I get at least one Blackberry to feel insecure enough to turn in their phones, leave the 2000’s behind, and join us forward-thinking people of 2011.



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